Is modesty for women only? “Modesty is Wisdom”!

(From the weekly bulletin “My Parish” issued by the Metropolis of Mount Lebanon for the Greek Orthodox Church). “I hope women understand that the church’s insistence on modesty is not a despotic stance. It is merely a recognition that a woman is not alone in the church, and that man is her partner in chastity. I hope she understands that she offends his chastity if she exposes provocative parts of her body, and she also offends her own chastity. In our view, the body is not a spectacle for hungry eyes. It is a place of loving encounter with the husband in a deep emotional relationship, of which sex is an expression. Outside this relationship, the body is covered. A woman knows in her intuition and experience that any indecent exposure is provocative. She knows the boundaries and does not need to be taught. We do not have legal judgments detailing matters minutely. Good taste is enough to know what should be covered and what may be revealed without hypocrisy or hiding behind the excuse that fashion dictates so. A woman is not a slave to fashion, nor is she a fashion model. It is not enough for her to say, ‘I like this,’ as there are many things in life we like but they harm us and harm others. It is a shame to lie and claim that the weather is hot. Men also feel the heat and yet they remain covered. If we must observe modesty in all circumstances, it is even more imperative to observe it in church, where believers go to pray, not to witness a fashion show! Everyone, both men and women, complains about the scenes at weddings (the crowning ceremony), where chastity is greatly violated. Perhaps the excuse is that there is a reception (dinner party) afterward. But is it obligatory for the dinner party to be immodest? The main harm in all this is that men are distracted from prayer; they do not hear the prayer because their eyes are captivated by temptation. Deeper still, the woman who flaunts her body forgets that her body is a place of encounter with her husband. If she has the right to beautify herself for him, does she have the right to beautify herself for everyone and wound their purity? Does this not harm her and them? Is this not vanity in beauty? If no one should boast of their intelligence or status, should a woman boast of her beauty? Is flaunting it cheaply not vanity? Analysts say that sexual arousal involves a lot of desire for dominance. In retaliation for the woman’s dominance, the man seeks to dominate the woman by enticing her with money. The supposed loving relationship between them turns into a master-slave relationship, with dominance shifting from him to her through money, and from her to him through temptation. There is a general standard of clothing that has become familiar, and there is what will never become familiar, even after a thousand years, if we still believe in chastity. The important thing is honesty and some courage so that a woman does not blindly imitate others or become a captive to fashion stores. You are responsible for your brother, whether in social gatherings, the office, or in the church. Your body is not an object; it is sacred after being anointed with chrism. I do not see how it can be holy if you willingly want to be a fashion model. This does not require great effort from you. Modesty is not heroism. It is enough to decide on it sincerely for Christ and to support the chastity of your brother.”